Just an update

I thought I should post a little on what we've been doing since our visit to Fort Wayne Neuro a few weeks ago. It feels like the last few weeks have been a complete whirlwind. Our cell phone bill actually went 45 minutes over our plan (I expected it to be much worse) as Brad uses that phone for business and personal and it's also the only phone I have. Many calls were made to different therapists, school officials, etc...to try and get some services around for Carson. It's never an easy process. I must say I still have a couple of places I'm waiting to hear from and I quite honestly haven't had time to sit on hold and wait for them to get to me. I just don't understand how places like this don't think it's necessary to return phone calls. Grr.....

Anyway....I had a case conference with the school this past Monday morning to discuss Carson's progress and also talk about getting him some Occupational Therapy. Turns out, they think he's doing great in the area of speech and don't think he will need any other services this summer. They shared that they will go into his preschool this fall and then let ME know if THEY think he needs any other services from them at that point. I can see that if Carson continues down this road, I will have a long, up hill battle with the school when it comes to him! At one point in his report, it was stated that Carson "is often quiet" during his speech sessions. So, please tell me, how does that translate to "He's doing great! We see no need for him to have any speech therapy this summer." If he's quiet, doesn't that mean he's not talking while he's there? HELLO! When it comes to his speech, I will say that since February, he's definitely "saying" more but he's no easier for me to understand and if you've never met him, you don't have a chance of getting what he's trying to tell you.

So...I had called his ST from First Steps when all of this went down to see if she would be available to work with him this summer as I refuse to not have him in any type of ST. She is so sweet and I was reminded that she works at the fee of $70/hr. which is...how should I say it, way out of our price range but we were willing to at least try something. Even if it meant that she would come once or twice a month and then instruct me on what to do with him on the off weeeks. Well, she stopped by yesterday afternoon to observe him for a little while and we talked about his speech (of course) and what needs to be worked on. She also shared with me that she does not think that Carson has Autism at all and instead feels that he is totally a "Sensory" kid. I go back and forth on this a lot but I also feel that I still see mild signs of autism in him.

So, basically, I'm still making calls and just waiting for June to get here. We had a busy weekend last week with lots of travelling and being gone. It took Carson until Tuesday to sleep through the night again, take a decent nap and not be completely "off" all day. In fact, we didn't even attempt church last week because we knew that he would not be able to function in his class as he hasn't the past several Sundays but especially after being off of his routine. I will say though, once things started getting back to normal for him, he had a really good week. So, we hang on and we wait.

This weekend, mama's doing the travelling and daddy is staying home with the chicks. I'm going with my mom and sister for an overnight getaway in Indy to see some long time friends. I don't think there will be much potty training going on but at this point, I think we all need a little break from it anyway. He doesn't seem to care if he does it or not! Until next time.....

All in a Lunch Hour

I post this only because some day, I hope to look back and think "Those were the good ole days!" I got up this morning, feeling pretty good about the day. The only obstacle (other than the daily things with Carson) is going to be getting Carson so speech without screaming. He's going through a phase right now where he really doesn't care to go and I think it has something to do with the other little boy that's in his session. Anyway...the morning went pretty smoothly, until lunch.
We're currently on week 8 of potty training so let that set the scene. I was standing in the kitchen, trying to figure out what to make for dinner and also asking Gabby what she wants for lunch. After running down the list of possibilities, she finally decides on Macaroni and Cheese. Carson over hears us and comes running out because he loves to help in the kitchen. While he's standing there, in his pajama pants (he had decided to go comando earlier), I suddenly see him start peeing, on the kitchen floor, a long 2 feet from where his potty chair is sitting. Apparently, he suddenly saw it too because he just looked down like he didn't know what to do. So, after the stream stopped, I took off his pants and socks and decided he was going bare bottom method as it's the only one that works.
I begin cleaning up the mess and then wash up to start lunch. I call Carson out to dump the mac into the pan and I put it on the stove. While all this is happening, I have Gabby, sitting at the island playing computer games and requesting I walk over there to see several different pictures of dogs as I guess she thought I would appreciate their cuteness as much as she did at that time.

O.k. back to what I'm making for dinner, what to cook, what to cook. Into the kitchen runs Carson and straight to his potty chair and POOPS! Big party goes on while I'm cleaning him up again and telling him what a good job he did. Oops, there goes the mac boiling over! I run into the kitchen and turn gas down and stir. Gabby has decided she wants to write words on paper but doesn't know how to spell ANYTHING she's wanting to write so she's asking me. I turn from the stove only to find the dog pooping on the floor and I realize I did see him standing at the back door 10 minutes ago but had forgotten. So, back to the floors it is to clean up. I get done and Mac is ready, I wash up and serve kids. Yes, Carson is still naked from the waist down and Gabby has to notice and ask, "Mom, why is Carson's winky out for lunch?" I respond with a very frustrated tone and tell her it's just easier to potty train him that way. This is between her rattling off Earth Day facts to me!

At some point, I get around to making a sandwich and take one bite in time for the kids to demand seconds. I serve them again and finish eating while standing. It makes no sense to sit and eat lunch when you are a mom.

It's now time to round up the kids and get Gabby to school. I am thinking that Carson is "emptied out" so I put him in underwear because we're only going to be gone for 10 minutes max, right. So, he's dressed, Gabby puts Benny in his cage and I take my allergy meds out to take them as my head is pounding and I know it's my allergies when I hear, "I pooped, mommy." Look around.....Carson is not on his POTTY CHAIR! Yep, that's right, he has pooped in his underwear and we are 30 seconds away from needing to leave the house. I instruct him to come over to me and he runs away with which I respond with loud yelling and threats! He finally comes to the bathroom and we clean up and put a pull up on. Load up in the car and take Gabby to school. I'm sitting here blogging and I can't remember if I ever took my meds but my head is still pounding!

And they say, "You're gonna miss this!"

Housework. It's a love/hate thing!

I really should be DOING housework, but, instead I'm sitting here thinking about it. I've been thinking lately about how there are some things that actually enjoy doing around the house and things I just hate to do. Here's a list....

First the good....I enjoy (or don't mind)...

Bathrooms
Dusting
Vaccuming
Windows
Organizing (o.k. I'll admit, this kinda gives me a rush!)

And the bad...I hate to...

DO THE LAUNDRY (Am I alone here?) I used to not mind the laundry but with the amount steadily growing...it's really a dreadful chore. I feel like it's never REALLY done.

Wash the dishes
Unload the dishwasher
Clean the fish aquarium
Clean out the car (Brad usually does this so I don't have to)

So, what do you love/hate about housework???

A taste of Autism? Maybe.

I know I left you hanging at the beginning of the week while I processed some thoughts and tried to organize them in my mind so I thought I'd try to bring you up to speed on what's going on with Carson. As you probably know, we took him to a neuropsychologist (whew...long word) on Monday and talked to her about things that we have been seeing in him over the past year. She didn't spend any one on one time with Carson but just sat and listened to us and then asked us questions and then booked him another appointment for testing in June. Testing could reveal that he's o.k. but from what we've told the doctor, this is what she thinks.....

Carson is what she considered PDD-NOS which means, Pervasive Development Disorder, Not Otherwise Specified. If you go to http://www.autismspeaks.org/ you can type PDD-NOS in the search box and it will bring up some more things to read.

What this means is that while Carson is not exhibiting behaviors of someone with full blown autsim, he is exibiting enough for them to be recognized and somewhat concerned. His inability to adjust to crowds of people, tip toe walking, rubbing head on the carpet most of the time while playing with toys, spinning, his small selection of food choices, along with even more was enough reason for concern for Brad and I and so we felt it best not to wait until kindergarten to see if it went away on it's own. We were afraid if we waited that long, then the problems would only mount.

So the doctor gave pretty firm instructions to get more speech therapy involved, along with more occupational therapy and some ABA therapy (Applied Behavioral Analysis) this will give him more time with kids and teach him how to interact with them better.

I left the appointment on Monday with a long list of numbers and people to call and felt at peace with things. The best part was that we didn't feel like we were crazy, this behavior really isn't "normal." Then, I woke up on Tuesday feeling completely depressed and not really wanting to believe this was happening to us. Even though, I have suspected it for almost a year now. I made a few phone calls that day that had to be made and then called it quits so I could just try to take it all in but quite honestly, all I wanted to do was sleep so I did lay down for a little while in the afternoon while Gabby was at school.

I am feeling better about things today. I know we're going to get through this and I shouldn't have been surprised by what the doctor said but, it still isn't something you want to hear about your child. Don't get me wrong, Carson is a lovable, happy little guy, we just know he has some issues that need to be worked out. So...here we go..................I'll keep posting on our progress and how testing goes in June! Thanks for your prayers!

Pick up the Pace

We currently have road construction going on just down the road from where we live. It's on a road that we frequently use to get from here to there. In fact, ALOT of people frequently use it. There was nothing wrong with this road when they began tearing it up last week, they're simply "breaking" it and then fixing it so that it will be wider and allow us to "pick up the pace" of life some more. As if we need to pick up the pace anymore! So...as I was sitting in traffic the other day, waiting to get across the road to hit the ATM and then back over again, I was thinking to myself...our schools budgets are getting cut and teachers are losing their jobs, which will in turn make our classroom sizes bigger, and yet so many of our tax dollars are going to widen the roads so that we can move even faster than we already are, in a life where we can hardly stop to catch our breath. Just some food for thought!

Neuro Appt.

Well, we had the appointment today. I am going to make this short as I am still trying to process. I just wanted to let you know that I am at peace with everything but we have a lot of work ahead of us and I have a lot of driving to appointments in my near future. If you will, give me a couple of days to gather my thoughts and I will post more about what we've learned. I am confident that we will get through this. It's not severe, it's just a lot of work, which I'm not afraid of! Thanks for reading and understanding!

Spring Break and Other Stuff

This week is spring break and as you may have guessed, we're at home! It has been a great week so far as I purposely didn't plan a whole lot because I wanted a week to just lay low and be with the kids. I only had one house to clean this morning so that was nice and I was home shortly after noon.

The weather has been great for the most part. It was 75 here on Monday with great sun! We ran errands in the morning which included a trip to the library and then had a playdate here on Monday. It was great to sit outside and sip tea while the kids played. I hadn't seen my friend Kim in awhile so it was nice to catch up with her. The kids sure slept good Monday night.

Yesterday was another great day! It was very windy but it was warm so we spent more time outside. Gabby has always been a lover of the outdoors and Carson seems to enjoy it a little more this year than last. He still isn't one to interact much when there are other kids here but Gabby does a great job of engaging with him and encouraging him to do things with her. It's nice to see the bond that they already share and I can only hope it continues as they grow.

Today we are inside as it is rainy outside but the sun is shining in here! We just finished a game of Monopoly Jr. and the kids are settled in with their t.v.'s for a little while so mama can have a break. Well, that was short, Carson just walked into the room! He would like to watch Toy Story which is his new obsession but can't quite wrap his mind around the fact that the dvd player is in our bedroom and daddy is the only one that knows how to hook it up to another t.v. so if he wants to see it, it will be upstairs and not down. This is just one example of what we're dealing with in Carson which leads me to share that we will be going down to the Lutheran Neuropsych Dept. on Monday for an evaluation.

We have been seeing a lot of things in him, lately again that, in my opinion, point to Asperger's Disorder. I hope to be told differently but we'll see. While I am relieved to have gotten him in on Monday (I just called yesterday) I would be lying if I said that it doesn't have me emotionally torn. No one ever wants anything to be wrong with their child and the reality that I may hear what I've been suspecting for almost a year now.....I don't know how to describe it. It will be a relief on one hand and heartbreaking on the other. Any time reality finally stares you in the face, it takes you to a whole new level and forces you to deal with the problem. I feel we have been doing what we can here as his parents to work on these things but also want to get him as much professional help as possible if we need it so he's ready to live a normal life when it's time for him to start school. I refuse to be one of those parents who lives in denial that something may be wrong, only to watch it get worse! Don't get me wrong..I'm not Munchausin Bi-Proxy (sp?). I don't crave the attention, I just want to help him.

The nice thing about this is that Brad and I are on the same page. If I didn't have him for mental and emotional support, I could not do this! Thank you, Brad for playing on my team with this! It means the world to me.

So, this week has been great. It's the most relaxing week I've had since we were in Florida in January. I am getting small amounts of spring cleaning done when I can and also reading up on Asperger's ALOT. Some things have changed since I worked with autistic kids but a lot is still the same! For now, all we can do is take it one day at a time.